Category Archives: Cinema

99 Homes (2014).

Michael Shannon is quite an extraordinary actor, and only a Tom Hardy or Michael Fassbender could inject such pathos and reasoning in a snake like Rick Carver. It’s Gordon Gekko for the 2007-2008 financial crisis, but with more of a backstory and a wee bit more humanity in the very naughty lad. He clearly exploits Garfield from the start but also sees massive potential in his brains and work ethic; it’s a relationship built on a knife edge.

And it shows you, to a degree, how this system works – exploitation, cynicism, government and corporations working together to screw you. And the exploited bails them out. It’s shocking but not really surprising.

Gripping all the way through, a life lesson and a character study.

Fabulous stuff.

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Tenet (2020).

I’m sure this was about something, and that something was something other than surface sheen and pyrotechnics, but it wasn’t something that interested me in the slightest.

So I won’t be bothering with a review other than that of Kenneth Branagh’s Russian ‘accent’, which receives a 0/5 from me.

Bye for now.

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Daredevil (2003) isn’t shite.

I expected something abysmal but instead found Mark Margolis, David Keith (not to be confused with Keith David), Vondas from The Wire, Joey Pants, the hulking Michael Clarke Duncan, and a possessed Colin Farrell having the time of his life, seemingly (“I want a bloody costume”). A colourful cast, folk that can act. Despite the unwatchable Jon Favreau (he is awful in everything), it’s not bad at all.

I was terribly entertained, and a sequel would have been at least pleasant. The movie has the standard silly one-liners and inevitable awkward attempts at comedy, but it’s suitably grim and grimy, and the story has some basis in a believable reality. I was also borderline shocked to see how much of this movie was appropriated for Batman Begins (2005), and the ending lifted verbatim.

Affleck is also fine in it. And the music is banging. 

#WakeMeUpInside. 

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The World at War (1973).

The incredible archive footage, the level of research, the interviews, the music, the sound of Laurence Olivier.

Sublime and unrivalled.

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Godzilla vs. Kong (2021). This is what cinema boils down to. And it’s ….

A behemoth chimp with an affinity for sign language. It wouldn’t be the first time for such a revelation – Koko.

It’s quite average in a pleasing fashion compared with most of the shite you see from these Multiverse/Monsterverse/Whatever worlds. What remains is the excruciating dialogue.

A non-character/cardboard hiree offers an observation regarding a life-changing vignette and a lad (usually a lad) retorts by saying the glaringly obvious.

It goes like this:

“It’s an easy mission, a kid could do it.”

“I hate kids.”

That’s the nature of these loopy exchanges, the gems from the writing room. There is no reason for anyone to spiel stuff like this, but they still do. It’s all confusing.

Just have folk in these flicks not speak, and present them reacting all flummoxed to stomping monsters merely through facial tics.

Good stuff in it: the voice of Lance Reddick (beautiful), and a monkey fighting a lizard on an aircraft carrier was absolutely insane in its realisation.

Is that it?

Watch it for 45 mins and then have a nap.

You won’t remember this film.

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Crimson Tide (1995).

Crimson Tide (1995) is fucking amazing, and it’s not just for the extended screaming stand-off between Gene and Denzel. It’s a film about an issue, a rather big issue, yet is shot with such electricity, edited and paced as good as any action-thriller, and with a Hans Zimmer score sounding like it was composed when he was conducting an esoteric shite. Even the intermittent pop culture references, weird as they are, kind of work, a way to relieve the unbearable tension.

You have five heart attacks watching this movie.

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Barbie (2023). I bit the bullet.

I didn’t mind it at all, and just watched it for the daftness and the epic tunes. 

I’m not going to read much into a movie about dolls. I got the the whole intention of the male/female power-dynamic/divide or whatever. It’s nothing I’ve ever thought about. Or cared to. Or ever will in this moment of time. 

Never seen a Barbie or Ken doll in my life, never wanted one, and have no interest in these creations. 

I’m sure there is a massive yet subtle subtext to everything in this film, but I’ll leave that to the ‘professionals’. 

It was entertaining. It has made a billion. Is that how easy it is? Movie about Bagpuss next. I want to see Bagpuss on a cocaine binge that Jordan Belfort would clap at.

Meow.

And ‘Barbie Girl’, THE tune of the ’90s, made an ‘appearance’. In a way ….

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In the Mood for Love (2000).

Talk about the transcendental. In its artistry and superior articulation of its themes, this really did remind me of the works of Yasujirō Ozu, and Toyko Story (1953) in particular.

It’s also a devastating watch and not something you’d stick on every year as it’s too accurate, too affecting, too profound. The ending is as haunting as anything I’ve seen.

It’s ranked 5th in Sight & Sound’s “Greatest Films of All Time” critics’ poll.

They’re not wrong.

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